New Mum, New Life
Life as a new Mum can be tough, but it's an incredible journey which has made me who I am, says Amy Burgess.
I was 23 when I became a Mum for the first time.
Fresh out of university and 6 months into my first job as a qualified paediatric nurse, I knew about babies and was well practised in changing nappies and the basics of caring for a baby.
However, nobody prepared me for the responsibility of having my own child.
After a fairly abnormal labour, I was in shock after her birth. Within 20 minutes of arriving at hospital a screaming, cone-shaped headed creature was placed onto my chest and in that moment I became a MUM.
What Do I Do Now?
The next few days were a challenge, establishing feeding patterns and learning all about our daughter. She was very feisty and made her feelings about everything known VERY clearly.
Those days were a blur of feeding, nappy changes and absolutely no sleep.
We were discharged home on day three. I remember sitting in our living room, baby asleep, wondering: what do I do now?
I have never experienced such tiredness before. I was used to night shifts and staying up all night to finish assignments, but this was something else! As hours rolled into days and days into weeks, the challenges changed.
Life as a Mum is incredible, but can also be a huge challenge, especially in today's society, with many people living away from family and so often lacking support with everyday life.
Loneliness Can Be Real
Loneliness can be very real and leave you feeling very isolated.
I understand the significance of the phrase, ‘It takes a village to raise a child’. We need people to support during those years, whether it means keeping you company during endless laundry tasks, or simply holding a baby so you can actually shower!
With my family living 250 miles away, I experienced this. I struggled being at home most of the time while my husband had the freedom to work and come and go as he pleased.
Going out anywhere became a huge effort of planning and organisation. Yet, over time, we realised we could still enjoy the things we liked doing, and incorporated our baby into that.
We had a fairly flexible ‘routine’ and babywearing, using our sling, meant she could sleep anytime, anywhere. She became part of who we were and we went as a family.
This helped my mental health hugely. I did not feel I was missing out and our daughter became very adaptable to different situations.
Absolute Joy
Life as a Mum is not all bad. The absolute joy when they first say your name ‘Mamma’, that little hand holding your face during a feed and the overwhelming amount of love for someone so small is amazing. It has changed me for the better and made me the person I am today.
When we first found out I was pregnant, I questioned: ‘Why now?’ Although a family was part of our life plan, it was not a ‘right now’ option.
In my prayer life, a song kept appearing which really spoke to us- “Oceans” by Hillsong United. The words really hit home: God has a plan for us which is more than we could ever imagine.
Whenever I was struggling, I played that song and prayed for God to guide me in my journey. As the children are older and the challenges change, I find myself still praying those words:
Spirit, lead me where my trust is without borders/ Let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me/ Take me deeper than my faith could ever wander/ And my faith will be made stronger in the presence of my Saviour.